What did you think of WWE Backlash? Here’s my view:

Jack Swagger vs. Chrisitan - ECW Championship Match
Excellent match to start off Backlash.  They decided to go with the three man team of Michael Cole, Jim Ross & Jerry “The King” Lawler for this one.  Shame.  I really like what Matt Stryker brings to the table.  The crowd was nice and hot for this as they proved to be all night.  Swagger looks great and Christian hasn’t lost a step.  Hopefully they keep the positive momentum going for both of them.  Kudos to Jim Ross for preserving the past with a Cowboy Bill Watts reference.  You’re not going to get that from “Oh My” Michael Cole. Finals came when Christian ducked out of an oncoming avalanche from Swagger causing him to crash into the exposed steel turnbuckle.  Christian then followed up by nailing him with his finisher  to win the match.  Christian wins the ECW Title! Michael Cole said that it was experience that won the match.  Actually, no  Michael. It was Christian’s exposing of the steel turnbuckle that knocked an oncoming Swagger to win.  King had it right:  “Christian cheated - but he still won!”  ***

They we cut to the back where Christian ran into Edge.  He told Edge that he used to be fun.  This could be the start of a programme between the two - together, or against. It took only 6 months, but finally they acknowledged that Edge and Christian knew each other.  I’d like to see the two of them parade around as Champions together, once again.

Chris Jericho vs. Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat
Always a treat to watch Ricky Steamboat wrestle in 2009.  That’s a sentence I wouldn’t expect to write if you would’ve asked me a year ago.  Steamboat held his own and the two had a really decent match - again.  Great Khali should take notes on how to sell and not blow spots - from both Steamboat & Jericho.  Steamboat got a few “You Still Got It” chants. And - well dammit, he does. Steamboat looked great here including doing a super-back drop off the top rope on Jericho and landing a flying body press for a near fall.  Still can’t believe I’m writing that in 2009.  Steamboat’s last singles match was 15 years ago at WCW Bash At The Beach against Steve Austin.  Jericho won via submission after he nailed Steamboat with the Code Breaker. **1/2

Comedy time with Santino the cross-dressing Canadian who does a GREAT Italian accent.  Beth Pheonix told Santino to stop pretending he is Santina so that he doesn’t have to kiss the Great Khali.  Santino refused to ackowledge his cross-dressing tendencies.  What came out of this segment?  Santino Marella fakes his orgasms.

Kane vs. CM Punk
Jerry Lawler said that CM Punk could cash in his Money In The Bank contract tonight on Backlash!  So, that of course means that it won’t be happening tonight. During the match, Cole made a comment about how Rey Mysterio knew just how demented Kane is.  Oh please, Michael - don’t remind us.  I think the only match that has been on WWE programming more than Kane vs Punk, is Booker T vs. Batista.  Here’s how the match concluded.  After about about 10 minutes, CM Punk began striking Kane over and over again - first a kick, then a midsection kick, then a front kick, then a right handed strike followed by a jab and a back hand strike. Kane was groggy after all of this. Yep, just groggy. No-sell-a-mania continued when CM Punk went for a front kick after all of that - but Kane caught the foot with one hand and choke-slammed Punk with the other for the victory. **1/2

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy - I quit Match
Your usual Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy match.  The two worked hard. Maybe I don’t see much in this feud because I’ve seen Owen vs. Bret.   Now THAT was a feud.  I don’t even see the heat out there. It doesn’t seem that the fans really care.  What do you think?  Finals of the match came when Matt Hardy ended up tied and laid out on a table.   Jeff went to the top of a ladder teasing a senton.  Matt started pleading with Jeff.  The referee held the mic up to Matt as he pleaded with Jeff not to continue, saying that they are brothers and how their family wouldn’t like it, blah blah blah.  He then yelled “I quit” ending the match.  Jeff gave him a whoppie cushion through the table for good measure.

The Great Khali & Santina
Well this was definitly Vince McMahon’s way of taking a piss on Jim Ross, as he likes to do. So now it’s time for “Santina” to kiss Great Khali.  Santina came out and said that he-she couldn’t do such a thing because he-she had a boyfriend and didn’t to break his honour as a lover.  David Kapoor WWE Writer Ranjin Singh said that the Great Khali DEMANDED to know who Santina’s boyfriend was.  Santina said it was Jim Ross.  I called it before he said it. He said that JR calls him his little Slobberknocker.  Kapoor said that Khali wants Santina to prove his love for JR by kissing him right now!  Michael Cole was having a blast here taking shots at JR calling him “Mr. BBQ man”. JR, who looked none to happy during this segment snapped back at Cole saying “Who gave you that line?” Jim, I can answer that one. It was Vince.  IT WAS VINCE ALL ALONG!!  Ahem. Sorry. Flashbacks to Vince-Austin.  Cole also asked JR if he was coming out of the closet.  Yikes.  Santina then said that “the vapors” were getting to her/him and he-she was going to faint.  Beth Phoenix came out and saved the day challenging Santina for the title of Miss Wrestlemania.  Cole took a few more shots at JR.

Legacy - Cody Runnels, Ted Dibiase & Randy Orton vs. Shane McMahon, Dave Batista & Hunter Hearst Helmsley - WWE Championship.
So here we have a rediculous match where the WWE SINGLES HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE is being defended in a six-man tag.  Ted Dibiase has such a likeness to his father it’s down right scary.  Ok match - full of Shane selling. The ending was quite entertaining, though;  With Tripe H and Orton in the ring,  Cody blasted Shane-o-mac on the outside with a chair. Batista, also on the outside, wanted revenged for Shane-O, so he went after Runnells with the chair.  He looked a bit like a dope as he stalled waiting for Triple H to come over to his side of the apron.  Anyhow,  since such a chair use on Runnels would warrant Triple H’s team to be disqualified - causing him to loose the title, Triple H stopped what he was doing in the ring to grab the chair from out of Batista’s grasp. The Game then turned right into Orton springing  up with an RKO.  He pinned Triple H for what was supposed to be a near fall 2 count.  Funny moment here as the bell keeper screwed up the finish and actually rang the bell here. Confusion.  Referee Mike Chioda waived off the bell and stressed that it was a two count.   So of course, we knew what was coming next.  After a punt not more than 10 seconds later, Orton wins the WWE title!  I’m suprised they actually went ahead with the planned punt finish since the time-keeper rang the bell already. From what I understand, one of VKM’s new-age decrees is that the refs shoot when necessary.  So, if a wrestler forgets to kick out, or doesn’t get a shoulder up before a 3 count, then they are to count three and end the match. I guess that doesn’t count if the bellkeeper prematurely rings the bell.  Not sure I like these stipulation heavy multi-man matches when it comes to singles titles.  That counts for the fatal fourways and the like.  I think it takes away from the focus of the title, not to mention the champion and challenger.  I agree with TNA Champion Mick Foley - let’s let singles title matches be fought for in, oh I don’t know, SINGLES matches. After the match Triple H sold the punt big time by being carried out on a stretcher. The annoucners sold it big time as something really serious.  A non-sympathetic crowd sung ‘goodbye’ to Triple H.***

Edge vs. John Cena - World Heavyweight Title.
Cena Sucks’ chants to kings things off.  Another funny moment midway into the match as Cena tried to throw the ring steps into the ring. They were too heavy so Cena looked really weak as he basically dropped the stairs.  Well, not so much drop it - they almost landed on him.  He was successfull, and barely, with his third attempt. Cena, later, threw the steps from inside of the ring into Edge’s face on the outside. Well, I’m glad he didn’t plan on using those steps again. We wouldn’t want him to have to try to pick them up again.  Moments later, Cena got a ‘holy shit’ chant out of the crowd after giving Edge the ‘attitude adjuster’ (what happened to the FU?) from the broadcast table to the front row of the WWE Universe. I didn’t notice any planted wrestlers there, but I can’t believe that they would allow Cena to just chuck Edge atop a bunch of fans. They were probably a bunch of FCW wrestlers. After Edge got up after an 8 count (after being thrown on the ‘fans’, he decided to run away.  Cena is in pursuit! Cena is in pursuit!   Cole just had to say it TWICE.  The two brawled throughout the crowd, through the concessions and eventually made their way up the isle and in front of the titan tron.  When Cena was about to nail Edge with the ‘attitude adjuster’,  Big Show came out from behind the curtain and choke-slammed Cena into one of those giant lights/fireworks machines shattering glass all over the place.  Wait, I thought Big Show was dating Edge’s wife? Edge is the new World champion! Cena takes a sick bump! ****

Overall, I think that this was a better Pay Per View than most. With the botched finish at the end of the show, the finish came of a bit flat, but it was still percieved as something big at the end of the night. Finally Triple H allows himself to be pinned.

What do you think of the outcome of WWE Backlash?  Glad to see 3 new champions?  What do you think this will lead to in the WWE’s future?

Monday Night RAW comes to us live on this 16th February - President’s day - on the heels of what I thought was a pretty lame Pay Per View: No Way Out.

My oh my how beautiful it is to see the heat magnet Vickie Guerrero open up Monday Night Raw.  Then, Edge came out.    As Edge was coming out, Jerry Lawler said that “It has been confirmed that Edge is the new WWE champion”.   Well, actually it’s been confirmed for about 24 hours now, Jerry.   Edge said that he was “remarkable, resplendent or really really smart” for winning the World title. Vicky finally said “Excuse me” after Edge called everyone ‘wrong’ for doubting him. After three ‘excuses me’s there’s no reason to watch.   She should just come out, say excuse me 3-5 times, and walk into the back.

John Cena came out and asked for a title match since the “R” in rated “R-SuperStar” stands for “Rematch”.  Edge said that he may not compete for a month and said he’s off to SmackDown.  Cena said that no matter what, he was going to find Edge.  Maybe Cena can find a wrestling hold while he’s at it.

Cryme Time & CM Punk vs. William Regal, Ted Dibiase Jr. & Cody Rhodes
During the entrances, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler said that tonight, the war between Shane McMahon and Randy Orton will finally end in an unsanctioned match between Shane McMahon & Randy Orton.  Wait a second, I thought that the war between Shane McMahon & Randy Orton ended last night? I mean, he pinned him clean.  Isn’t that why I paid $50 on the pay per view for? Well, I guess since Triple H was busy winning the title last night, this’ll be his chance to get in on the McMahon family vs. Randy Orton feud.  Ted Dibiase Jr. got the pin for his team with his finisher, “Dream Street”. Apparently he told Jerry Lawler to ‘watch out’ for it tonight. Thanks for telling us AFTER the match, so that we can look for it too, King.

Then we go to some bad acting between Shane & Stephanie. Shane says that he can’t believe that they got people to buy the PPV last night. Stephanie laughed and said that she loves giving away Pay Per View matches on TV right the night after the PPV.

 Well, no - it didn’t exactly go like that.  Can somebody put Stephanie through a table, already? Pretty please?

Chris Jericho came out to endorse the movie “The Wrestler”, and was interupted by Rowdy Roddy Piper!   Piper said he’s going to SHOOT!   So he told Jericho to SHUT THE HELL UP. Jericho kicked Piper after he heard enou gh. Jerry Lawler said that this was the worst thing that he’s ever seen in his career. Really Mr. Lawler? EVER?  Really? A kick to the stomach and jab and a kick or two here. The worst you’ve seen, eh? Ok fireboy.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6DxpdijlLc8&hl=en&fs=1]

Kane squashed Jaimed Noble in 16 seconds.
Sporting a shiner from last night, JBL came out on the longest reigning episodic television show in history, WWE RAW. Shawn Michaels came out and did a promo as “HBK, the Showstopper” on JBL. He reminded us that he was no longer in financial trouble. Looks like one of these two will loose to the Undertaker at Wrasslemania.

Mike Knox vs. Rey Mysterio
Rey won with a cradle. Yawn.

Beth Pheonix vs. Melina
Seeing Santino come the the ring…is he now a Diva?  Funny moment on commentary during the Divas match. Michael Cole asks Jerry lawler something like…”How do you think Rosa’s doing as an intern”. or “What do you think Rosa’s learning from Beth Pheonix?”. After getting a long-winded reply from Lawler, Cole then later asked Lawler,”How do you think Rosa is learning from Santino?” King replied, “What i want to know, is why are you asking me these stupid questions? Just starting conversation?” Melina wins.

Terry Funk into the Hall!

We goto the back and Stephanie has a crappy cell phone service. It’s now time for Shane McMahon vs. Randy Orton II! So it’s unsanctioned and all and the big payoff is Randy Orton punting Shane AND giving an RKO to Stephanie McMahon.  Triple H came out to chase Orton way. He was crying and in rage hovering over Stephanie as Legacy backed up the isle. 

Maybe Triple H was crying because he was thinking about all of the wrestlers that he’s buried over the years…? Did you like RAW?

Here are a list of Wrestlers (past and present) who are pretty much superior to John Cena in every way.

Apologies for duplicates….

Wrestlers better than John Cena
1. Chris Benoit
2. Dynamite Kid
3. Davey Boy Smith
4. Road Warriors
5. Rick Flair
6. Magnum T.A.
7. Ole and Arn Anderson
8. Nick Bockwinkle
9. Stan ‘The Man’ Stasiak
10. Bruno Sammartino
11. Bob Backlund
12. Kurt Angle
13. Sting
14. Midnight Express
15. Killer Kowalski
16. Dick the Bruiser
17. The Crusher
18. Ivan Putski
19. Iron Shiek
20. Ivan and Nakitia Koloff
21. Rock -n- Roll Express
22. Brett Hart
23. Tito Santana
24. Randy Savage
25. A.J. Styles
26. C.M. Punk
27. Billy Gunn
28. Pedro Morales
29. Eddie Guerrero
30. Chief Jay Strogbow
31. Fabulous Freebirds
32. Von Erichs
33. Sgt. Slaughter
34. The Rock
35. Stone Cold Steve Austin
36. Ricky Steamboat
37.’Superstar’ Billy Grahm
38. Cpl. Kirschner
39. Fabulous Moolah (I’m serious)
40.’Rugged’ Ronnie Garvin
41. Ted Dibiase
42. Terry Taylor
43. Demolition
44. Killer Bees
45. Shawn Michaels
46. Booker T.
47. Hulk Hogan
48. Goldberg
49. Undertaker
50. A quadrapalegic
51. Primo
52&53&54. The Legacy
55. William Regal
56. Big Boss Man
57. Stone Cold
58. The Rock
59. Umaga
60. Jamie Noble
61. Chuck Palumbo
62. super Crazy
63. The Sandman
64. Tommy Dreamer
65. Mickie James
66. Awesome Kong (assuming she doesn’t eat him)
67. Viscera”"” “”"”"
68. Tyson Kidd
69. Jack Swagger
70. Chris Masters
71. Aj Styles
72. Eddie guerrero
73. Scott Steiner
74. DH Smith
75. Hulk Hogan

WWE nO wAY oUT 2009
16th Feb 2009

The Pay Per View wasn’t all that bad - nothing special either.  Matches were ok - crowd seemed to be up for most of the show.

Triple H vs. Edge vs. Undertaker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Big Show - WWE Championship Elimination Chamber match.
       So we start off with one of the matches the match that we’re all  supposed to buy the PPV for? Ok then.  What ever happened to the days of slow build?   You would start off with something slightly above a squash match.  Sure we don’t want a Mark Henry versus Ryan Braddock situation - but a MVP vs. Kung Fu Naki match is kinda fun.  Well, no Kaenti, here - the Heavyweight title was on the line.

Ok so Edge is the first to go in minutes.   And so the title is guaranteed to change hands AGAIN.  Twice in as many months?  No wonder people people don’t take the titles seriously.   CM Punk, to EDGE, to Hardy, to Triple H - YIKES.   Somewhere Bruno Sammartino is grinding his teeth.  Triple H gets the big one in becoming 13 time WWE Champion.  It would’ve been nice to see the Undertaker win it, but I suppose if HHH is the champion, that makes more sense for Randy Orton to pick him as his Wrestlemania opponent in continuing the Orton vs. Mcmahon feud.  Of course, the son-in-law, Triple H will soon be getting involved.  For those who are keeping score,  in TNA there’s been mention  in promos (by Kurt Angle) of Kurt Angle’s next title win being his 13th reign. Triple H even got to put his foot on the ropes,  for a near fall, after a tombstone.  Wow, he IS Superman. ***

Shane McMahon vs. Randy Orton
Poor Randy Orton.  I was able to sit in on a series of interview sessions Randy Orton recently did in promotion of the pay per view - and boy oh boy did I feel sorry for him when he had to sell the idea of Shane McMahon posing as a viable threat to him.    Randy was quite hilarious.  During one of the interviews Randy made the guys start over because they never told him that the interview started. So he was a bit out of character and made them start over.   Another entertaining one was when Orton did an interview with a show out of Farmington, New Mexico.  A caller got on and began to tell a story about how he was near Randy Orton in an airport.  Apparently Orton was with Super Crazy and another wrestler.  So apparently there were loud mexicans nearby and Orton told Crazy to control his people.   The whole story didn’t make it on the air as they cut him off before he got out what Orton said.    After that mishap, one of the DJs asked Orton how he got into the business.  Orton said, clearly annoyed, “Well, if you did your homework, you would know that I’m a 3rd generation superstar…”   Then, they had some intern that sounded like he was 14 ask Orton some pretty lame questions.  At the end of the interview, Orton thanked them for “The professional interview”.   After the interview, Orton goes “What the fuck was that?” .

 Shane opened the match with those weak looking punches - you know, the ones that barely even reach the chest of Orton.  Early on in the match these was even a groan from the crowd as Randy looked just rediculous selling those ‘punches’.  Orton’s got tons of heat and Shane works the crowd well, so it was a fun match to watch.   Later, Shane had Orton on the announce table. He was going to the top rope for that elbow he’s been known to do, but then Rhodes and Dibiase interfered.  Michael Cole then goes:
“One can only wonder what Shane was going to do, but we’ll never know.”
Um. Cole. You twit.  He was going to do an elbow drop onto Orton throught the table. Duh. Quick, somebody call Adamle.   McMahon gave the coast to coast/Van-Terminator to Rhodes.  Randy won with a RKO.  Shane took some nice bumps as always.  I like watching Shane.  **3/4

Jack Swagger vs. Fit Finlay - ECW Championship
Yea, that’s it. Let’s follow an Elimination Chamber match AND the match with the #1 heel in the company with The All American American.  I wonder if he’s as much as a Man’s Man that Steven Regal was.  Well, at least we get to hear Matt Stryker do his weekly solo work.  No 70s references this time around.  Some ‘boring’ chants. Swagger won after his finisher on Finlay. Next? Christian vs. Swagger.  **

Shawn Michael vs. JBL
Shawn Michaels won with a savatte kick (sweet chin music).  Thank God this awful angle is over.  There have been some pretty unbelievable angle of recent years, and this one was just too much for me.   Shawn Michaels working for JBL?  This angle has done so much in hurting Michaels.  He’ll recover, because he’s Shawn Michaels. But I remember last week on RAW, when Ric Flair put over Michaels, the crowd booed Michaels!  I mean, since Flair was putting him over in a serious respectful tone you would think that the crowd would realise we’re talking about ‘the real’ Shawn Michaels, here. But nope.  Either that means the angle got over the kids well, or it just killed all of the heat Michaels had coming off of last year’s Wrestlemania.  Michaels won cleanly and walked off with his wife, Rebecca, who was put on camera numerous times before, during and after the match.  Next?  JBL tries to hire all of the immigrant wrestlers for Layfield Enterprises.  Jimmy Wang Yang, Mysterio, Funaki - prepare yourselves. **

John Cena vs. Mike Knox vs. John Cena vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Kane
Well Edge came down and attacked Kofi Kingston, knocking him out of the match and taking his place. But, wait…if this is a RAW match, then how can Edge do this? Anyway, as WWE fans have come to learn, an EDGE insertion into a match means an EDGE victory.  Didn’t we just see this? Pretty ok match. Mysterio pinning Kane got a nice pop.  The final two were indeed Rey Mysterio & Edge - tons of near falls with tremendous heat. Edge got the victory after a spear, winning the WWE Championship in a suprise victory as he wasn’t in the match to begin with. ***